The Artist's Way Week 5: Recovering a Sense of Possibility and Confronting The Virtue Trap
Week 5: Recovering a Sense of Possibility
For four weeks now, we’ve worked on uncovering the fears, negativity, and doubt that reside in us that keep us from reaching our full potential. Through the practice of morning pages and the artist’s date, we’ve also been exploring new-found interests and stepping into a world where our inner artist is beginning to emerge and shape the person who we were meant to be.
In Week 5, we are continuing this work of uncovering hidden blocks so that we can start believing in a world of abundance and possibility, and readily receive all that it has to offer.
A note on abundance
Believing in abundance means believing in an unlimited supply of good that is available for all of us to receive. This includes things like ideas, jobs, projects, wealth, success, goodness, happiness, etc. (you fill in the blank). Everyone has equal access to this supply, and there is enough for everyone to receive. We cannot deprive others with our own abundance, and someone else’s abundance cannot deprive us either.
Abundance is a river that flows generously, and all are welcome to receive the goodness it brings. As blocked creatives though, we don’t access this river for one of two reasons: (1) we don’t believe in it (we function from a mindset of scarcity where we believe that our “luck” is limited and that we will run out of good ideas/good fortune), or (2) we don’t think we’re good enough to drink from the river (we believe there’s no room for us and that we don’t deserve it).
Week 5 is about changing our mindset, finding the river, and accepting its generosity.
The Virtue Trap
The Virtue Trap is one of the biggest blocks that keep us from finding the river.
Here’s how Julia describes it:
“We strive to be good, to be nice, to be helpful, to be unselfish. We want to be generous, of service, of the world. But what we really want is to be left alone. When we can’t get others to leave us alone, we eventually abandon ourselves. To others, we may look like we’re there. We may act like we’re there. But our true self has gone to the ground.
Like a listless circus animal prodded into performing, it does its tricks. It goes through its routine. It earns its applause. But all of the hoopla falls on deaf ears. We are dead to it. Our artist is not merely out of sorts. Our artist has checked out. Our life is now an out-of-body experience. We’re gone.”
- Julia Cameron
This excerpt really strikes a chord with me because Julia could’ve easily been describing me just a few years ago.
I used to be a master at spreading myself thin in the name of virtue, both in my professional and personal life. I stayed at a job that made me miserable because it was the “right” and “respectful” thing to do. I continued in a Ph.D. Program that I no longer felt passionate about simply because I thought I needed to finish what I started. I bent over backwards for people, appeasing expectations, and sacrificing all my time and energy on others, all while my physical and mental health were deteriorating.
I really did become a shell of myself - someone who just went through the motions with no purpose and no passion. I showed up for the sake of others, never acknowledging my own unhappiness, and continued to be stuck. Can anyone else relate?
It makes sense - most of us want to be good, helpful, unselfish, noble, and generous. And that’s why it’s so easy to fall into this virtue trap. We trick ourselves into believing that we’re living a fulfilled life because of all the “good” that we’re doing. But if we take a closer look, it’s a life of never having the heart to say no, having little to no boundaries, making others happy while you quietly suffer, and never having time for yourself or the things you love. As you can see, when we get stuck in the virtue trap, it isn’t honorable or virtuous - it’s self-destruction.
Are you self-destructive? Are you stuck in the virtue trap?
Here’s an exercise from the book that I found helpful, and ’d love for you to give it a try.
The Virtue Trap Quiz (fill in the blank)
The biggest lack in my life is ______________________.
The greatest joy in my life is ______________________.
My largest time commitment is ___________________.
As I play more, I work ___________________________.
I feel guilty that I am ____________________________.
I worry that ____________________________________.
If my dreams come true, my family will _____________.
I sabotage myself so people will __________________.
If I let myself feel is, I’m angry that I ________________.
One reason I get sad sometimes is ________________.
In the spirit of being vulnerable and encouraging you to do the same, here are some of my answers from when I first went through The Artist’s Way: (to give you some context, these were my answers from early 2016, right after I quit my job.)
The biggest lack in my life is: good health.
I worry that: I will never find my career path.
I sabotage myself so people will: love me.
One reason I get sad sometimes is: because I don’t feel good enough.
If you’re up for sharing some of your answers with me, leave me a comment below or send me a message on Instagram (@everleafdesigns). I’d love to hear from you :)
I’d love to conclude by sharing one more exercise for you:
Number your page from 1 to 20 and fill out 20 sentences that start with the words “I wish”. Write down whatever comes to your mind. Place it somewhere where you can see it every day.
Sometimes the simple act of writing out the things you wish for is the first step in taking action towards a life you could’ve only imagined.
I hope you can find some alone time this week to daydream and really soak in the belief that anything is possible. The river is flowing and there is always space for you.
Thanks for reading. See you next week!